Cheese! nomnomnom!

Raining non stop since this morning, light drizzle, heavy rain.
My mood is so similar to the weather now.
Eh, don't read cos it's just my thoughts about something and about D, so its like, a blabbering.

This year = suay year, afterall rat year.
I began to have short temper those blah blah things.
D began to resumed smoking yet again.
And I know for one thing, forcing to stop smoking didn't turn out as well as I thought.
The level of my temper just rises each time D smokes, and in return, I began to get angry over a lil matter or thing.

My views since the time D started to smoke again:
Yea, remember that sms, where you said you are relieved I'm not disappointed when you picked up smoking again. Not disappointed at the surface yea, but within, just abit and damn worried, when will you ever stop smoking, and this time, really, for real or temporary?
You realized that I began to get mad almost every single thing that happens, and this goes on to become an argument. You began to realize my short temperness, and mind it, for what happen today, alot.
Yea, I don't mind others who smoke, but you are not just other people, you are D. I mind you smoking, as I've said before, my health, is weak, compared to yours. Don't wanna see your life shorten with every breath of smoke you take in. My health is naturally weak, but not yours, if your health is weak, its cos you caused it, with all that smoking.
Yea, its your bad habit, my bad habit, or should I say its a habit, its me getting furious when you smoke. Though I tried, and closed an eye when you smoke one or two times per day, but you can see me telling you to smoke after that number of times.
Yea, you told me you will not buy a box of cigarettes soon, I believed that cos, your D. But how do I feel when the very next day, when you have finished up that box, and yea, you bought something for me to snack on, and it also includes a new box of cigarettes that you have said you -replenished-, the feeling is from +ve, due to the snack that you bought, straight downwards to -ve. Maybe I'm too petty, when I thought you say you will not buy soon, but instead, a new one the very next day.
You said you don't mind my temper much, but is that really true? Since what happen today, you mind it to the core. I mind you smoking, I don't want your health to be so wasted. I'm trying what I can, just to make that box of cigarettes last as along as possible. No need to say about yesterday, in my view, yep, that box of cigarettes can last very long, only if you kept borrowing rods from friends. Can see me telling you to give back to your friend, but you kept being stubborn, and wanted to smoke it so badly. Tried to take the cig, and in return? Your friend's rod came out of his fingers, and drop onto the wet floor- wasted. And you still kept holding on to that rod that your friend gave, thought you will return that rod to him, and let him smoke, since its his. But yea, he said its fine, and took out another rod, and your still holding onto that particular rod. Finally? You smoke. And I explode. I still remember last time when you tell me you prefer me to force you not to smoke, than to let you have the freedom to smoke whenever you want. But since what happened yesterday, I tried, and you don't let me, your choosing the latter choice- to have the freedom to smoke whenever you want. When I tried, you will be stubborn and pushed me away. Once you start pushing, my temper rises.
Yea, maybe I'm wrong, to be even petty at you smoking, but the reason is clear, and thats why I hope you will understand, if you do, my temper will fade. But when I think in your shoes, its sure to be like,' What for I stop smoking? When I'm bored, nothing to do, or just plain stress, a rod is just within my reach. Why the hell you care when its me smoking, and not you? It's my health, my life, I can do what I can. You can see a ah pei still smoking, and he looks so healthy. Don't force me not to do things which I like to do.'
All that, is my view, yes you have your views, but I want you to just read my views, repeat your views again, and I wish you can answer why I am that forceful to you smoking than anything else, and why I mind so much. My temper will fade, don't keep minding so much about it. All I want is cooperation, which I'm seeing none at the moment.
Well, thats my view, it will make you more angry. But no matter what, I just want you to know how I felt, thats all.