Cheese! nomnomnom!

one month finally passed, and almost soon to end sem 1 liao.. sure will damn miss the classmates I know and friends with de..
and just realised that, when i blog, is the time when i wanna vent all spill out all my blahblah in a go most of the time, including this blog too.

friday, nowadays im getting more and more distracted in school liao.. dont wanna do anything, too tired to research.. just wish i can pon school for a day or two just go sleep..

anyone know how i really feel ma, irl?
i know i love to bottled up stuff in front of people, but then again, how i wish got someone out there can see through me. and apparrently, titan is able to, to my surprise.

titan know about my prob irl, besides afew i know, titan's the one i can mostly really can vent on( ps worx.x), and no matter what we debate or chat or talk, in the end, theres bound to be something he says that makes me forget my moodiness and become crazy and crap about with titan, really have to say thanks wor! DUM BOY:P

anyways.. maybe stress ba, tiredness just kept getting into me since last week. irl probs, mainly a particular one, hurts me now and again..

i know my bad points, i dont want someone close rub it into me, saying out my bad points in a raised tone when i said a sentence or two out. in just one day, 'childish', 'paranoid', 'stop being sensitive!', i know thats my bad points, do you know that i've been trying, and it failed? do you even know the reason why? all you can tell me is just those, do you even realised that im still trying? even when if i did change for just a tad better, i dont see you commenting anything about it, and just on my bad points. it discourages me.

since yesterday, i've ask you, what am i to you? who am i to you? yes, my bad points are coming out more and more, since this few days, you, you arent what your normally are, at least, just towards me. you went quiet, and yet again 'dont think so much can anot?', not i wan think so much, is just why you can't answer with this question, 'just who am i to you?' is it that difficult to answer ma..?

guess you slept le, your last msg disheartens me. 'stop being sensitive!'. i don't know what to reply you, is it im too soft hearted not to shoot about your bad points like how you raise your tone towards me ma? its always me, the one in fault, and yes, i couldnt figure out why your doing this to me, actions, tone, gestures. what i think when you started doing that? avoiding, pushing, why are you doing this? cos you dont bothered, dont care, not interested in how i feel ma?

are you doing all this.. cos you wan me to give up? if thats the case, i have no comments le. the answer is the same as what i say, no. even if within damn broken, no.
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sitting at the corner again
thinking, with a tiny hope that it will be alright
but at the end of the day
splinters of glasses plunged directly within
but a thread of hope stays strong
the hope that says:
i will be waiting till you are finally back
the day where 'it' can be mend
a tiny wish within me,
'don't ever let go of my hand'